Monday, December 7, 2009

It's Almost Par-tay Time!

It's been another CA-RAZY day at work and I'm so ready for this week to end. Actually, I'm wanting the project at work I've been slaving over to end and that happens on Friday. So, I'd be one happy gal if this week could quickly pass and the weekend could begin! Our holiday party is this Saturday which is just so nuts. I mean, I remember planning with Allison a month ago and bam, here we are! It's that whole 'time is quickly passing' thing I keep referencing. I'm so freakin' excited about the party though, woooo!

Anyway, the weekend was excellent and I finally feel like I caught up on some much needed down time. I got laundry done Friday, kicked back with a little vino, and slept in on Saturday. It was cold and rainy here so I actually allowed myself to relax and watch some tv, heehee. I got a new running shirt/jacket and went over to Allison's in the afternoon to put our menu together for the party. Man, I'm already drooling thinking of all the fun appetizers we'll be making! I ran a couple of miles when we finished and then headed home (in the first snow of the season!) to cook what would turn out to be one of the best pasta dishes I've made in quite some time. I don't wanna brag buuuut...! :P I drank a bunch of water and got in bed at a decent time so I could wake up super early and get myself all ready for the race!

I left the house Sunday morning around 7:15am and froze my little toosh off. Of course it would be the first below freezing morning we've had yet. Despite that, I ran an awesome race and ended up beating my last 10K time by NINE minutes! I was so proud of myself and felt strong and solid about it. I finished in 54 minutes and couldn't have been happier. :) From there, I actually ran home from Central Park (seriously to keep warm), showered, and went on to Westchester with Allison and Theo to do all the party shopping. Theo was so gracious in driving us out there so we could hope to save a little money...and boy did we! Overall, the party is costing about $300 less than we thought and that just makes me beyond happy. After shopping, I went straight to Citibar in time for kickoff and watched the Giants put a hurtin' on the Cowboys. That, my friends, completed a nearly perfect weekend.

Sadly, I was woken up at 2am by one of the most real dreams I've had in a couple of years. It was basically Tom and I meeting up to talk about where we both are in life right now and what we see happening in the future. We confessed strong feelings for one another and how much we still love each other. Even in my dream, I said this is really not happening and I'm going to wake up from this dream just devastated, aren't I? I mean, talk about the subconscious working overtime. I dunno, it affected me a lot and it's taken the better part of the day for me to shake it off. It's ironic (actually, more coincidental than anything) that I'm not going to counseling tonight and I seriously feel like I'm being more 'attacked', if you will. I'm just doing my best to deal with this sadness and to work through it as it comes. Today is just one of those days where the huge question lingering is why can't we just be together. It's tough when these days happen because I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that we shouldn't be together right now. It's just the mind tricks that get so hard and, for all I know, he's frolicking around with some new gal. But, you know what? I can't even go there. So I won't. It's just been a tough day and I gotta push on.

I'm just going to enjoy my evening "off" tonight and do a light workout, eat the rest of my delicious pasta, and watch the season finale of Dexter. Onward and upward...

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